A Definition Of Love
February is traditionally a month when love is in the air being the Valentine month. When 14th arrives many of us wonder what kind of love greeting will arrive if any and how that will happen.
Shops laden with delicacies in chocolate box wrapping, roses bursting out of cellophane and ribbon and rows upon rows of love messages on cards may suggest that everyone must have a partner in life and for those who do not, can sometimes be reminded that this is a day for lovers that somehow they are not a part of.
Every year on Valentines’ Day since my father passed to Spirit in 1988 I have bought my mother a single red rose. One reason for this is because I am sure she misses the very same each year from my father. The second reason is to celebrate my love for her that I appreciate and give thanks for 365 days of the year.
But love is never restricted to any one day or one means of expression.
As a medium I have had many experiences with clients of how love can be varied and so very different and unique which sometimes can be misunderstood. I can recall many examples of that which is given with love by one and interpreted differently by another.
One of these was when Helen came to see me for a private reading. Following the passing of her mother Helen had difficulty in accepting that her mother was often seemingly uninterested in her life and offered little in the way of advice and support in her blossoming career as a lawyer.
Before Helen arrived I sensed a mother in my energy waiting patiently and as soon as the reading began I could feel the love and pride from mother to daughter as the words formed in my mind Please tell Helen I am so proud of her.
As the communication unfolded Helens mother spoke of how much her daughter had achieved. Her mother also described Helens independence and her mother felt there was no advice she could offer as her daughter seemed so in charge of her own life. Being a Lawyer was not a world that Helen’s mother understood and so she felt she little that was productive to contribute, but her love and pride were unfaltering.
I never realised my mother felt that way Helen said through tear filled eyes I just assumed she didn’t love me.
Love in its Many Forms
Love comes in many different guises, which are not always easy to notice or realise. It can come in the form of passionate or unconditional love, a denial into what can be seen by one as potentially difficult or harmful situation, or a refusal to assist a loved one in a situation that they believe is not in their best interest.
With this perspective it may be easier to examine the relationships of those closest to us in life and ask the question if love is actually present and is the motivation for actions that perhaps are different from our own perceptions.
I recently noticed a quote on a park bench that read Love is a measure of how much one is prepared to give up for it.
I believe that also means being brave enough to give up thinking patterns that prevent us from seeing the real love in someone’s intention and celebrating love in all of its forms of glory every day of the year.
sometimes love is knowing when to say NO! even though it would be easier to say yes but in doing so you would not really help that person, I know from experience our son never spoke to us for three years but in the end he thanked us for saying NO so yes love can be very hard as well as soft and passionate we all need both kinds at sometime in our life and I know that love never dies it continues even in spirit as it does in life
Dearest Donna thank you for this blog it has made me look at things a bit differently regarding my Mum not that I was a high flyer like Helen. I had DNA done as it I had always been told that my Dad , who I never knew, was from Canada native Indian or from America. Guess what no DNA from that part of the world at all. I am now living a little day dream that my adopted father was intact my true father who had an affair with his sister in law, sorry Daddy. This might explain why my adopted Mother ie my true Aunt was quite cold towards me as a child and was so jealous of me. Any way there is more to that story so I won’t rattle on here and bore you. Maybe a one to one might help to sort it but I just don’t know. Lots of love lovely and wandeful lady, have you a gentleman friend now as I think you told me the last one didn’t work out. Makes my heart glad that you give your dear Duchess a rose on Valentine’s. Day. XxxJackie. PS meant to tell you I am singing with Rock Choir on the 8th April at Wembley xxx
Thank you for sharing the experience here with your son Philip which I am sure will inspire other parents in that oh so difficult situation. We do all need both at times in our life and it’s good to know that this had a positive outcome for you all…x
Thank you for ‘A definition of Love. Such beautiful words spoken from the heart.